it entire life and deemed up a duplicate

it was the fall of my seventh grade year. normally my favorite time of year with leaves of all colors swaying down beneath my feet, the crunchy sounds with each step. Cool fresh air breezing across my face. Each holiday being just around the corner. Each fall seemed like a fresh start. Except this one, this fall felt as though I stepped out of an airplane thirty thousand feet in the air without a parachute.. without warnings.. the wind catching my breath with each gasp unexpectedly.

I remember walking up to school with my head held high ready to start my year off strong. Yet all I could feel were my classmates eyes piercing me up and down like daggers. My thoughts were racing with thoughts even my mind could not comprehend; wondering the ups and the downs, the ins and the outs, as the whispers drowned over me like a tidal wave in a hurricane. It wasn’t until recess where I, and my then best friend were pulled out into the hallway by both of our teachers and the principal. Tears filling her eyes, those moments standing in center field with mumbles of ” why would you do this” “i thought we were friends” and “how could you” were a blur. My life went into slow motion, as i stepped back into class and walked slowly to my desk. I was 2007’s new target for cyber-bullying. Turns out someone I was close with took my entire life and deemed up a duplicate “Myspace” profile impersonating me before school took place. Everything from my own personal pictures, to an “about me” excerpt that looks as though I could have written. They had added everybody from the school and surrounding area, commenting nasty things on those I called friends pages. Going as far as to tell my then best friend that “I wish her mom would have died.” All of this happening behind my back with no idea in sight on whom would do this to me, or even a why. That moment in time is when i truly knew fear. I have never felt so alone, so despised, and so lost in my life. I could not understand how I became the dartboard for another human beings entertainment.

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