Arranged marriage is a marriage in which the husband and wife are chosen for each other by their parents. How has arranged marriages evolved over-time for our young generation? In the early centuries arranged marriages were very popular, it would give financial benefits to the bride’s parents as way of giving their daughter off to someone who would love her as much as they have. In the older times arranged marriages were also about honor and those kids who would keep their parents honor would also be awarded financially to become stable into their new lives, this was mostly applied for the males of the family (“Arranged Marriage”, para.1). There are many cultures that consist of arranged marriages and each culture has their own rules as how an arranged marriage should be set up. Arranged marriages now is not really preferred, people are now interested in finding their own life partner because the title of “arranged marriage” does not sound right to them, but it is still existent and has become different (“19th century arranged marriages”). Arranged marriages then compared to now are very different in many aspects, research has proven that arranged marriages has worked more successfully compared to love marriages.Arranged marriages in the olden times were based what the parents decided for child and what they thought was the best choice for them.
Although the father has the first right to make the decision for their children there were many things involved to consider a marriage offer and usually the things involved to consider a marriage offer is how well established the person was and another thing that was considered was the family background and how rich the is. Many cultures have their own traditions of having to deal with marriage offers. For example, in the Pakistani / Indian cultures believed that an arranged marriage should be set up by the parents and the bride and groom should just be informed of what is happening when a marriage offer is sent by the groom’s parents to the bride’s parents (“Arranged Marriages a Tradition in Pakistan”, 2012, February 29). The bride and groom do not meet until the wedding night, so it was a rule out of many that the bride and groom should not meet until they are married.
Buddhism and Judaism have some of the same rules for arranged marriages which consist of the father making the decisions for their children and when the marriage is finalized their many gifts given to each other’s families like cattle, goats, sheep or money (“Countries Where Arranged Marriages are Common”). Each religion believes that whether it is an arranged or love marriage each religion believes that both genders should be virgins because they believe that the boys and girls bodies should be very pure and that it is a very great sin to have intercourse before marriage (Fish, J. M., April 27,2010). Many cultures believe that couples should not be dating because some believe that the couple should not be alone together because it can lead to many bad things. Each culture has their own traditions of arranged marriages but all cultures have a tradition that includes the father having the highest honor in the whole family especially when it comes to dealing with marriages. Besides the all the planning that goes into having an arranged marriage one thing that people of all religion still believe is that both genders should be virgins and should not do intercourse until they are married and after they have full freedom to do anything they want. Arranged marriages today still include the parents finding a husband or wife for their children.
The only thing that has been changed up is that parents do not expect their children to listen to everything they say which means that after the wedding offer comes both the guy and girl are given time to think about the offer and whether the decision is going to be right for them in the future or whether it will be the decision for their future. Females and males are now both given the choice to make their own decisions of marriage and parents do not want to make their child feel forced into getting married if they do not think it is right for them or it can affect them in a negative way. Age is also considered now more than before because in the olden times they believed that once both male and female go through their first menstruation cycle they should have been married, this was usually which many Pakistani/Indian traditions (“Arranged Marriages a Tradition in Pakistan, February 29, 2012).
Now most families consider females that are may be in their mid to low twenties and males that are mid to high twenties, since most people believe that women should get married to someone who olden then them. Both females and males are usually have finished with their education and are working full time jobs, they are highly requested because most families do not their husbands or wife’s to be studying after marriage (Hays, J. (n.d.). “ARRANGED MARRIAGES IN INDIA”). Another thing that has become part of culture is that the male and female meet which other are not blindly married to one another.
They have added this because parents think that the male and female should have some understanding about each other and see some background thoughts that they have on certain topics. Another thing that has changed now is that the male and female were not a loud to meet each other alone and now many go on dates which parents approve of because they think that they should give their child enough freedom for them to tell what and who the child thinks is right for compared to what and who they think is wrong for them. One thing that is still being carried on is that people still believe that both male and female should be virgins and should not participate in any sexual activity because it is a big sin and their bodies will not be pure. In conclusion there are still many cultures and believe in arranged marriage which they think is the best choice for their child and they believe that they can find the best choice for a life partner for their children if they allow them.
Many kids do not believe in arranged marriage because they feel that they are independent enough to make that decision for themselves. Most people believe that love marriage is the right thing to have because later kids cannot complain to their parents that it is their parents fault that the wedding is not working out for either of the couple (“The Culture of Arranged Marriages in India”., 2015, June 02″. Parents also think that if a child can choose a partner for themselves, it is the best thing for them as they feel that it is not always the easiest task to find a certain someone for yourself that your parents will also approve of too.
For example, after a couple has thought through the whole process of marriage together and their parents approve of the couple the parents of the couple after that are eligible of taking the matter into their own hands and dealing with the wedding things themselves but with the help of their son or daughter along with them (“Pakistani Wedding Traditions”. 2015, February 23). Even though love marriage has become more common in our generation another thing that is also certain is that arranged marriages still exist and many arranged marriages have worked out better for many couples compared to love marriage which has resulted into divorce for some couples (“What Religions Practice Arranged Marriages?” (n.d.), para.3&4).
Many people think that they are compatible with one another until they start living together, which when they find out all the bad things about each other which can result in divorce. Arranged marriages have proven to be successful because if we look at our grandparents or maybe even parents we can see they have such a strong bond with each other no matter how the situations have been we always look at our grandparents as an inspiration of finding ourselves a person that is just like them personality wise. Some traditions that have not changed overtime is that people still believe that being a virgin is best before any marriage because people believe that is something that should be broken after marriage.